Andrew J. Schwartzberg

Updated: March 23rd, 2015

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Andrew J.´s Popular Contributions

Contributions by Andrew J. Schwartzberg

MAD Magazine • USA • New York

MAD Magazine #304July 1991

Unsolved Museries (Writer with Jack Davis)
Department: Re-Enacts To Grind

MAD Magazine #309March 1992

Inside Back Cover: The Yo-Yo Like Activity That Has Its Ups and Downs (Writer with William T. Raschendorfer)

MAD Magazine #310April 1992

The Three (Writer with Tom Bunk)
Department: For Letter Or Worse

MAD Magazine #313September 1992

World's Great Thinkers Go To a Baseball Game (Writer with Mort Drucker)
Department: No Runs, No Hits, Several Eras

MAD Magazine #320July 1993

Mad's Baseball Rotisserie League Draft Form (Writer with Rick Tulka)
Department: Batsmen and Ribbin'
Job Opportunities for Presidential Runner-Ups (Writer with Drew Friedman)
Department: Seeking Hire Office

MAD Magazine #342January 1996

You Know America's Been Nuked When... (Writer)
Department: Atoms Ribbed (various places around the magazine)

MAD Magazine #345May 1996

When "Per Serving" Information is Placed on Everything (Writer with Glenn Barr)
Department: Pro-Apportion

MAD Magazine #347July 1996

What if God Was One of Us? (Writer with Drew Friedman)
Department: Almighty Fodder

MAD Magazine #349October 1996

Little Known Facts About America's Hottest Tourist Attractions (Writer with Tom Bunk)
Department: Trip-Tease

MAD Magazine #350October 1996

Better Things Millionaires Can Do to Help the USA Than Run for President (Writer with Rick Tulka)
Department: Shoving It Up Their Assets
Back Cover: MAD’s Mandatory School Uniform for the ’90s (Writer with George Woodbridge)

MAD Magazine #352December 1996

Concert Pairings That Make Sense (Writer)
Department: Various places around the magazine
Generation X Job Resume (Writer with Greg Theakston)
Department: The Cobaine of our Existence
A Typical Night in the City That Never Sleeps (Writer with Rick Tulka)
Department: I'm in a New York State of Slime
Back Cover: Tired of Blending in with the Crowd? - Just for Rodman Hair Color (Writer with AP/Wide World Photos)

MAD Magazine #353January 1997

You'll Probably Win That Sexual Harrassment Suit If... (Writer with Timothy Shamey)
Department: Hit on Miss

MAD Magazine #356April 1997

The Bad Cop's Guide to Good Police Work (Writer with George Woodbridge)
Department: Brute Farce

MAD Magazine #358June 1997

Watch Out Guys, It's a Chick Flick! (Writer with Rick Tulka)
Department: Behind the Nauseate Ball

MAD Magazine #360August 1997

Redneck USA (Writer with R.J. Matson)
Department: The Drooling Class
Shakespearean Sonnets for Modern Lovers (Writer with Timothy Shamey)
Department: Bard Silly

MAD Magazine #361September 1997

If Clinton and Yeltsin Held Their Summits in a Private Online Chat Room (Writer with Rick Tulka)
Department: Internyet

MAD Magazine #364December 1997

Important Lessons Learned from the Mars Pathfinder Mission (Writer with Thomas Hachtman)
Department: A Rocket Full of Miracles

MAD Magazine #365January 1998

The Dallas Cowboys Off-the-Field Playbook (Writer with Gerry Gersten)
Department: X's and Oh-Oh's
Siskel & Ebert Trash Home Movies (Writer with Mort Drucker)
Department: Thumb Like it Not

MAD Magazine #367March 1998

Little Known Facts About Europe's Hottest Tourist Attractions (Writer with Paul Coker, Jr.)
Department: Trip Tease

MAD Magazine #371July 1998

When Non-Sports Shows Use the "Fox Box" Concept (Writer with Drew Friedman)
Department: Stats Entertainment
Cyber-Snaps - Yo' Mamma Jokes for Computer Nerds (Writer with Grey Blackwell)
Department: www.Insult.Comedy

MAD Magazine #377January 1999

13. Norm "Crybaby" McDonald "Norm McDonald Lost His Job" (Writer with Mort Drucker)

MAD Magazine #378February 1999

The Loveline Advice Chart for Dysfunctional Celebrities (Writer with Joe Ciardiello)
Department: Campy Counseling

MAD Magazine #381May 1999

Pop Up Porno Videos (Writer with Hermann Mejia)
Department: Who Gives a Flying Fact

MAD Magazine #385September 1999

When Other Celebrities Jump on the poetry Bandwagon (Writer with Paul Coker, Jr., John Biederman)

MAD Magazine #394June 2000

Wes Craven (Writer with Bill Wray)
Department: Celebrity Satire

MAD Magazine #437January 2004

1. The California Recall: Media Circus of the Stars (Writer with Steven Chorney)
Department: The MAD 20 - The dumbest People, Events & Things of 2003

MAD Magazine #445September 2004

24 Hours of NBC's endless olympic coverage (Writer with Paul Coker, Jr.)
Department: Must Flee TV

MAD Magazine #449January 2005

15. Same Sex Weddings - Here comes the hide (Writer with Tim Okamura, Patrick Merrel)
Department: The MAD 20 dumbest people, events and things of 2004

MAD Magazine #452April 2005

Ben Affleck - The Art of the Poker Face (Writer with Drew Friedman)
Department: A MAD Ad Parody

MAD Magazine #453May 2005

The Fundalini Pages: "Studpid IKEA product name or cartoon sound effect", "Bitterman", "Punchlines in search of a joke", "The Kitchen sink: The lowest-rated Top100 Countdown TV shows", "Highlights from Michael Jackson's latest video message to the world", "Graphic Novel Review: The Custodians", "Melvin & Jenkins' guide to partygoing", "Fundalini Foto News: The 2005 Grammy Awards", Baseball Steroid (Author with Desmond Devlin, John Caldwell, Scott Maiko, Greg Laub, Charles Akins, Rick Tulka, Don Edwing, Kevin Pope, Garth Gerhart, Jerry Ordway)
Department: Random Acts of Mindless

MAD Magazine #458October 2005

The Fundalini Pages: "A cable news director's guide to Sorta Newsworthy vs. Very Newsworthy", "A decade by decade gift pyramide for guys", "Desperate new army enticements to get more people to enlist", "Joke Set-Ups in search of a Punchline", "Bitterman", "Celebrity cause-of-death betting odds: Lindsay Lohan", "The Godfrey Report", "The puzzle Nook", "The president's dog", "On Newsstand now: Nuns (Author with Jacob Lambert, Garth Gerhart, Patrick Merrel, Ed Steckley, John Caldwell, Peter Kuper, Scott Maiko, Mike Snider, Scott Bricher, John Pound, Charles Akins, Dick DeBartolo, Jeff Kruse, Jack Syracuse, L.P. Ferrante, Hermann Mejia, P.C. Vey)
Department: Random Acts of Mindless

MAD Magazine #472December 2006

The Fundalini Pages; "Other things hidden in the Prison Break Tattoo!", "More high concept movie titles from the producers of Snakes on Plane", "Melvin & Jenkins guide to the science fair", "The fast 5 reasons why Rocky Balboa will be the best Rocky yet", "The cover we did not use", "In the land of the blind is king, AND...", "Other autographed apologies of baseball players", "Important product Re (Author with Rick Tulka, Matthew A. Cohen, Angelo Torres, Kevin Pope, Kiernan P. Schmitt, Desmond Devlin, Jack Syracuse, Tom Cheney, Scott Bricher, Jeff Kruse, Dick DeBartolo, Jacob Lambert, Darren Johnson)
Department: Random Acts of Mindless