MAD Magazine #397

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Vey To Go - car-driving bear

Artist, Writer: P.C. Vey

Contents Page

"Many a good egg ends up getting beaten!"

Department: Alfred E. Neuman Quotes

Advertisement for Color Classics #2 - September 2000

Letters (with photos of Deborah Harry with Mad)

Page: 4

Gatorador

Department: Crowe's Feat

Artist: Angelo Torres Writer: Arnie Kogen

Monroe &... The High Seas - Part Two: The Monkey Island Massacre

Department: Angster's Paradise

Artist: Bill Wray Writer: Anthony Barbieri

Page: 11

Legitimate Gripes of Your Average Serial Killer

Department: Dumb and Dahmer

Artist, Writer: John Caldwell

Page: 15

Melvin & Jenkins' Guide to Hospitals

Department: The Schmucks Stop Here

Writer: Desmond Devlin Artist: Kevin Pope

Page: 18

Alternate Designs for the New $20 Bill

Department: The Bucks Flop Here

Artist: Scott Bricher Writer: Darren Johnson

Page: 20

Letters to Britney Spears

Department: Guided Missive Attacks

Artist: Jack Syracuse Writer: Mike Snider

Page: 24

Spy vs. Spy

Department: Joke and Dagger

Artist, Writer: Peter Kuper

Page: 26

A Mad Peek Behind the Scenes at a Modern Health Spa

Department: An Embarrassement of Richard's

Artist: Paul Coker, Jr. Writer: Dick DeBartolo

Page: 28

Modern Celebrity Couple Dilemmas

Department: Airing Their Dirty Quandary

Artist: Rick Tulka Writer: Mike Snider

Page: 30

Mad's Modern Military Course Catalog

Department: The Armed Farces

Artist: George Woodbridge Writer: Andrew J. Schwartzberg Writer: Mike Snider

Page: 33

A Mad Look at Swimming Pools

Department: Serge-In General

Artist, Writer: Sergio Aragonés

Page: 36

The Lighter Side of...

Department: Berg's Eye View

Artist, Writer: Dave Berg

Page: 39

Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow

Department: Selecting the Right High School Clique for You: The Shredder Clique

Artist: Tom Bunk

Page: 43

Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow

Department: Selecting the Right High School Clique for You: The Cyber-Geek Clique

Artist: Timothy Shamey

Page: 44

Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow

Department: Selecting the Right High School Clique for You: The Stoner Clique

Artist: Leslie Sternbergh

Page: 44

Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow

Department: Selecting the Right High School Clique for You: The Rah-Rah Clique

Artist: Hermann Mejia

Page: 45

Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow

Department: Selecting the Right High School Clique for You: The God Squad Clique

Artist: R.J. Matson

Page: 45

Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow

Department: Selecting the Right High School Clique for You: The Wigger Clique

Artist: Kyle Baker

Page: 46

Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow

Department: Selecting the Right High School Clique for You: The Junior P. C. Clique

Artist: Amanda Conner

Page: 46

Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow

Department: Selecting the Right High School Clique for You: The Drama Dweeb Clique

Artist: Ray Alma

Page: 47

Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow

Department: Selecting the Right High School Clique for You: The Psycho Clique

Artist: Bill Wray

Page: 47

Mad's Celebrity Cause-Of-Death Betting Odds: The Taco Bell Chihuahua

Department: Grieving Las Vegas

Artist: Hermann Mejia Writer: Mike Snider

Page: 48

Drawn Out Dramas (Various Places around the Magazine)

Artist, Writer: Sergio Aragonés

Back Cover Inside: What change to the landscape do environmentalists fear the most?

Artist, Writer: Al Jaffee

Back Cover: The Rock Concert

Artist: Tom Bunk Writer: Michael Gallagher