MAD Magazine #389

MAD Magazine #389 • USA • 1st Edition - New York
1st Edition - New York
January 1st, 2000
The 20 dumbest people, events and things of 1999!
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Cover Variations

Table of Contents

Advertisement for Subscriptions with Kelly Freas artwork

Contents Page

"The reason most people talk to themselves is because they're often the only ones who will listen!"

Department: Alfred E. Neuman Quotes

Advertisement for Mad XL #1 - January 2000 - featuring Frank Jacobs's The Mad World of William M. Gaines

The Duck Stops Here

Artist, Writer: Don Edwing


The Supremos

Department: Guns 'N' Neurosis

Artist: Mort Drucker Writer: Arnie Kogen

Monroe &... Christmas

Department: Angster's Paradise

Artist: Bill Wray Writer: Anthony Barbieri

Absurd Man of Alcatraz

Department: Tales from the Duck Side

Artist, Writer: Don Edwing

The MAD 20 Dumbest People, Events and Things of...

  • 1. Y2K Panic

    Artist: Tom Bunk

  • 2. Hillary Clinton's World (Andrew Wyath's Christina's World painting parody)

    Artist: Richard Williams

  • 3. Teen Exploitation Flicks - "Movie Title Graffiti"

    Writer: Russ Cooper

  • 4. Livin' La Vida Overrated "When Other Artists Jump on the Latin Music Craze"

    Artist: Hermann Mejia

  • 5. George W. Bush's Snow Job - "got coke?" (got milk? ad parody)

    Photographer: Irving Schild

  • 6. Jerry Falwell Takes On Tinky-Winky - "Televangelist-Tubbies"

    Writer: Charlie Kadau Artist: Jack Syracuse

  • 7. Around the Clock John F. Kennedy Jr. Crash Coverage (People magazine cover parody)

    Writer: Joe Raiola Writer: David Shayne

  • 8. America's Hang Up With Cell Phones - "The Talker" - (Rodin's The Thinker parody)

  • 9. Sega Introduces the Dreamcast - "Buy 'R' Toys" - (Toys 'R' Us ad parody)

    Artist: Scott Bricher Writer: Scott Maiko

  • 10. The Umpires Strike Out - "Taken Out of the Ball Game" - (Take Me Out to the Ball Game song parody)

    Writer: Desmond Devlin Artist: Keith Seidel

  • 11. The Blair Witch Project - "Eerie Comparisons Between The Wizard of Oz and The Blair Witch Project"

    Writer: Desmond Devlin Artist: Sam Sisco

  • 12. Monica Tells All - "Phrases That We Knew Would Never Appear in Monica Lewinski's Autobiography"

    Photographer: Irving Schild Writer: Jeff Kruse

  • 13. Woodstock '99 - "3 Days of Pricey Mayhem" - (3 Days of Peace & Music poster parody)

    Writer: Scott Maiko

  • 14. Stock Market Frenzy - "A Typical Investment Ad For Suckers (Like You!)"

    Writer: Dick DeBartolo Writer: Jim Johnstone Artist: George Woodbridge

  • 15. Beanie Babies Call It Quits... Yeah, Right! - "The Telltale Signs of Post-Beanie Syndrome"

    Writer: Desmond Devlin Artist: Lisa Haney

  • 16. Random Acts of Senseless Violence - "A Bumper Sticker We're Sure to See"

    Photographer: Irving Schild Writer: Michael Gallagher

  • 17. Tae-Bo Fitness For Fools - "Tie-Blo" (ad parody)

    Photographer: Irving Schild Writer: Mike Snider

  • 18. List-O-Mania! - "12 Stupid Lists You May Have Missed"

    Writer: Tom Stern

  • 19. Pamela Anderson's Breast Implants - Fold-In

    Artist, Writer: Al Jaffee

  • 20. Jar-Jar Binks - "A Movie Poster We'd All Like to See"

    Artist: Roberto Parada

The Sick Sense

Department: Dead Man Working

Writer: Dick DeBartolo Artist: Angelo Torres

A Mad Look at Parking

Department: Serge-In General

Artist, Writer: Sergio Aragonés

Melvin & Jenkins' Guide to the Millennium

Department: The Schmuck Stops Here

Writer: Desmond Devlin Artist: Kevin Pope

Spy vs. Spy

Department: Joke and Dagger

Artist, Writer: Peter Kuper

Mad's 1999 Political Christmas Carols

Department: Oh Little Town of Washington

Artist: Paul Coker, Jr. Writer: Frank Jacobs

Mad's Celebrity Cause-Of-Death Betting Odds: Conan O'Brien

Department: Grieving Las Vegas

Artist: Hermann Mejia Writer: Mike Snider

Drawn Out Dramas (Various Places around the Magazine)

Artist, Writer: Sergio Aragonés

Back Cover Inside: What ball are many people anxiously waiting to see finally drop?

Artist, Writer: Al Jaffee

Back Cover: A Monumental Disaster

Writer: Frank Jacobs Artist: Mark Stutzman